A: This question comes up regularly, and if you've ever asked it, you're not alone. Sometimes the hardest part of healing from betrayal isn't the initial wound—it's the aftermath. You prepared, invested, gave everything you had to something you believed in. Then trusted people let you down in ways you never imagined possible.

Now you're struggling to re-engage with life, with relationships, with the things that used to matter. You feel distant from God, skeptical of leadership, and stuck in a loop of anger and frustration.

And here's the question that haunts you: Is something wrong with me?

Here's what makes this so complicated:

When you've been betrayed by people you've trusted during a vulnerable time, your system goes into protection mode. It's like a turtle that bravely comes out of her shell, then gets attacked by raccoons. Retreating into the shell isn't pathological—it's protective. It's wise.

But even after the racoons leave, the turtle doesn't immediately come back out. She needs time to feel safe again. And that's exactly what you're doing.

Your current struggle makes complete sense given what you experienced.

You were betrayed during an extremely vulnerable time. People you trusted failed you profoundly. The fact that you're skeptical, struggling to trust, feeling distant from God, finding it hard to re-engage—these aren't character flaws or spiritual failures. They're normal responses to an abnormal situation.

But here's what healthy re-engagement looks like:

Honor your need for protection. Notice when you feel safe enough to "peek out" and when you need to retreat. Honor both the protection and the gradual steps forward.

Practice immediate self-care. Go outside. Check the mail. Spend time with something that brings you joy—even if it's as simple as caring for a plant. Your body needs these basics to heal.

Continue building momentum. Keep taking walks. Keep working out. These might seem small, but they're significant steps forward. Don't minimize them.

Notice your progress. If talking about what happened today feels different than it did before—maybe you felt frustration instead of panic—that's meaningful progress in your healing.

Reflect on what feels okay to discuss. You have complete choice about what you want to talk about and when. If you need a break from unpacking the story, that's completely okay.

Remember this Truth in God's Word: "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." ~ Psalm 34:18 (NIV)

You still have purpose. You still have a calling. God still loves you. This broken experience doesn't define your future, even though it feels like it colors everything. The turtle doesn't come back out of its shell immediately after the foxes leave—it needs time to feel safe again. Be patient with yourself as you take gradual steps toward re-engagement.

You're doing better than you think. Keep taking it one small step at a time.